In a recent reading, the Queen of Swords showed up reversed as an underlying factor that I felt was the most important card in this particular spread. I had asked about coping strategies (intentioned/considered reactions) and defense mechanisms (automatic/instinctual reactions) trying to gain more insight on how the querent handled challenging and stressful situations in a Tarot Therapy session.
The Queen of Swords reversed is certainly a defensive person, and as part of that defensiveness, she can be quite cutting with her language. It is instinct for this Queen - when reversed - to expertly inflict severe damage with minimal words. She has a sharp mind and quick wit, and when this is paired with being defensive, it is quite the weapon.
The Queen of Swords reversed is a perfectionist to a fault. In my opinion, I think pursuing perfectionism of any kind, in any facet of life, will always be to an eventual fault. The issue with our reversed Queen - and with most perfectionists - is that with this perfectionism comes serious self-criticism.
Self-criticism and perfectionism can be dangerous habits to fall into, as they can lead to feelings of burnout, low self-esteem, and dissatisfaction with life. These destructive patterns of thinking typically involve overly harsh and rigid standards of behavior, as well as a tendency to focus on one's shortcomings and mistakes, instead of positive achievements. It's hard to see our past successes as successes when we harp on the little mistakes involved.
When it comes to understanding perfectionism, it's important to recognize that it is a form of self-criticism, and it can have a major impact on our quality of life. Perfectionism isn't just about pushing yourself to do your best; it's about holding yourself to unattainable standards and constantly striving to reach an unrealistic level of excellence.
If you find yourself struggling with perfectionism, it's important to take a step back and assess what is driving the behavior. Often, perfectionism is rooted in a fear of failure and a need to please others. Releasing yourself from the pressure to meet impossible standards can be a liberating experience. By taking the time to recognize and work through the underlying causes of perfectionism, you can begin to break the cycle of self-criticism and open yourself up to new possibilities.
Some of the underlying causes of perfectionism can come from external pressures such as messages from family, peers, and society at large, that can make us feel inadequate or like we must strive to be perfect in order to be accepted. Negative self-talk, or the harsh inner dialogue (hello, reversed Queen of Swords!) we use to talk to ourselves, can also be a contributing factor. Sometimes, this negative self-talk is the echo of a primary caregiver in early childhood, or a boss you've had that pushed you to your limit, leading to feelings of incompetence.
Specific to this reading, it was clear that old memories and pain were the driving force behind the Queens' need to retreat into solitude when threatened; which, is a common coping strategy for this Queen. On the other hand, this Queens' defense mechanism is to be critical, sharp and prickly when facing a perceived danger.
When our Queen shows up reversed it's a message to rewire our negative thinking and release some of the pressures that are; truthfully, self-inflicted or a simple; yet, inherently flawed, part of our perception. When it comes to being defensive, the Queen reversed indicates that the querent is someone who uses hurtful words to shut down the situation and retreat. Perfectionism not only leads to deep self-criticism, but in this reading, indicated that criticism of all kind would put our querent on the immediate defense and trigger feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy.
Sometimes our reversed Queen of Swords is temporary due to a recent change of situation in which we are not adapting well or recent minor criticism . Other times; however, our reversed Queen can be a character trait that is deeply ingrained in our psyche. Which, was the case in this particular reading. Returning to the upright Queen is only a matter of making sense of what life has delivered despite this Queens fair share of pain and suffering.
The first step in devaluing our self-criticism is to recognize that our thoughts are not always true. We need to be aware that we can create our own meaning from our experiences and not let our negative thoughts define us. It is also important to challenge our negative thoughts by questioning them. Instead of letting our negative thoughts go unchecked, ask yourself if the thought is logical and supported by evidence. If not, it can be helpful to reframe the thought in a more positive and constructive way.
Find the silver linings! Shoo away the clouds! And go easy on yourself. Don't let the reversed Queen of Swords crop up more than once! Heed the message to practice gratitude outwardly and compassion inwardly. You are your biggest fan and worst enemy!
When the Queen of Swords shows up reversed, it's time to feed the groupie in you and shut down any threatening competition that berates you with, "Are you good enough?"
Spoiler! You are ;)
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